I’ve been pretty busy lately. It’s quite an undertaking birthing an online community – I had no idea what I was in for. Plus, I have two children, a husband, Emmi Interiors’ clients, a house, etc., etc., to manage as well. I’ve been working seven days a week, all day long, for too many weeks now. So, yesterday, at the insistence of my husband, I took the day off. I guess it was the crying that inspired him, but he let me know in no uncertain terms that I was running myself into the ground and needed to stop.
If passing out at 11:30 p.m. isn’t rest, what is? I decided to start with breakfast, which I ate while listening to music and doing Sudoku. Obviously, I was out of “take time to smell the flowers” practice, because I was still multitasking. Later I meditated, or tried to, while unnerving thoughts about what I should have been doing kept going through my mind. I compromised by puttering around, doing small inane tasks that satisfied my need to do something, but took no real energy. By the time I got to yoga, I did better with focusing on the moment.
Finally, I was able to curl up on my bed and watch television. Maybe it was my love of Kyra Sedgwick and “The Closer” that calmed me, but it was very relaxing nonetheless. Whenever I thought about work, I reminded myself that work was for tomorrow. I remembered that during my treatment days I needed to do the same thing – stop myself from continuously focusing on cancer. I would really be with my children, watch something that made me laugh, be with friends – anything for a few seconds of relief from cancer. We cannot sustain work or worry 24/7. We need to find ways to rest, recharge and rebuild. We all have different ways of attaining rest; let me know what works for you. I’m sure I would learn a lot.
Survival > Existence,